So last week I had a rough life...
I 'had' to spend six days on Lake Mead in a houseboat reading, taking naps, snorkeling, hiking, etc... Man, that was tough!
The first half of the week was spent with thirty other awesome guys involved in youth ministry just getting to know each other, share common problems and triumphs associated with ministry, family and life. It was real good for me and I definitely learned a few things about myself as I always do.
The 'retreat' never really has an agenda or schedule, but some underlying 'theme' seems to always be the topic for discussion. This trip came at the perfect time, because it seems
this last year I've been struggling with some new things I haven't had to necessarily deal with before.
And that is
BALANCE. I'm finding it hard to know the limits of how much time to spend doing my ministry and how much time to spend with my family. It is a little different than maybe someone in church ministry because
I LIVE where I work and do ministry... so I find it harder to say "No" especially when I thoroughly enjoy what I do at camp (program camps). I love spending time with campers, youth pastors and youth workers, staff, the band, and the speakers...
I love that interaction, because in the back of mind I know I need to 'soak' up as much as I can because come the middle of August everyone goes their separate ways until, hopefully, the next year.
But in a way my family time 'suffers' for that.
Am I being selfish? I've recognized that Rachel and I have grown a little apart over the last 7-8 months (don't worry it's nothing drastic, and we do talk about it), part of it is having small children in the house and the other part, I think, is not having the communication that we should on a
regular basis.
For anybody who has been married for awhile you know how easy it to fall into certain patterns and become complacent in your marriage and not 'work' as hard to please your spouse like you did when you were both in the 'honeymoon' phase.
I don't want to be years down the road and one day my marriage implodes, we have nothing in common except our children, and wonder where it all went wrong!
This was the question I put out there to everyone on the trip..."
How do I find the BALANCE between my family life, my ministry AND time for myself, (all which I thouroughly enjoy devoting time to), and still be an excellant husband and father while also being an effective leader in my ministry."
During those three days I was able to glean knowledge from some awesome men whom I respect greatly and they gave some great advice on what I should and shouldn't do based on their experiences which I think will benefit me greatly.
It will definitely take a little bit of work and adjustment, but the end results for my family's sake and mine will be greatly worth it.
If you guys have any thoughts or advice, by all means please contribute.
The second half of the week was spent with the evergrowing Pondo staff on a 'super yacht' houseboat having a blast and also getting to know each better in semi-tight quarters. Check out
Nikki's blog for pics and details.
